Wednesday, August 20, 2014

This is Crystal.. I am the 16 yr old part of all these many lovely different parts. And right now I am so privileged to have the job of looking after Kalesa the 4 yr old part who has control over this body.
And sometimes it can be very depressing.
Kalesa is so misunderstood in the things that she says or asks.
People forget that she is only 4 yrs old.. a bit more mature then other 4 yr olds... but she is just 4 and greatly misunderstood in what she says.
Four yr olds tend to just blurt things out and they don't really think some times before they say things.
Things aren't meant to hurt others.
She is hurt easily by words....her "job" as a part was to please the bad men....so that is what she knows.... please others.....that is good...but if you do wrong your are punished.....
it is hard some times explaining  what is said by other people......I get a headache sometimes trying to do this.
Sometimes it is just easier to omit somethings said  and then I dont have to explain and explain and explain  over and over and over!
All she wants is approval and to know that some one is there for her.
I never knew that life could be so tough for a 4 yr old!
My head hurts bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Thursday, August 14, 2014

Eyes  gennas  makeds  a  new  notes  heres.

Everys  bodys  bees  toos  busys  fors  mees.  Dats  whats  happeneds  wiffs  my  new  mommys.  She  getteds  tireds  ofs  mees  ands  nows  she  nots  talkeds  toos  mees  or  gibes  mees  wittles  wetters.
Dens  eyes  makeds  friends  ands  she  twelleds  dems  dats  eyes  takeds  ups  deres  times-es  and  nots  toos  talkeds  toos  mees  no  mores.
Sews  dens  eyes  nots  habes  friends  heres  no  mores.
Ands  dens  deres  bees  utters  peoples  dats  twelleds  mees  deys  bees  my  friends-es and now  deys nots  talkeds  toos  mees  no  mores  or  gibes  mees  wittles  wetters  ebers.
No  bodys  habes  times-es  fors  toos  bees  my  friends  no  mores.
Sews  nows  eyes  bees  alls  bys  my selbes  wiffs  no  bodys  toos  talkeds  toos  or nuff-ings.
Eyes  nots  bees  port-tins  nuffs  fors  no  bodys.
Dats  bees  ways  eyes  bees  d-presseds  and  stuffs.
Whens  no  bodys  wants  yous...............

Saturday, August 2, 2014

Boy! Almost a year ago! And what you have to do to get back on the page!!!!
Might as well be the government!
This is Crystal...
Lets see a catch up I guess is in order.
Well since last October... left foot still needs operation on.. havent been able to wear a shoe in almost THREE  yrs!  Va docs dont give a damn!
Diabetes.. well still out of control;  since the visiting nurse fried my pancreas with my solumedroil(sp)
IV med for my MS.  Doc said that my pancreas basically doesnt work at all any more. So that means 3-5 shots of insulin a day.
K really likes that!
Cyst in left side of face..still there and still infected...that doc doesnt like me and I dont like him!! He is a real ass hole!!!!!!!!!  FINALLY   going to get a second opinion but I have to drive 3 1/2 hrs to get it!!!!!!!
Had a MRI of head-yearly thing done because of MS.
Showed NO NEW  lesions in brain but new lesions down neck.. Never had them there before .. can be why we are falling more. Cant ride a bike at all any more.  No sense of balance.
No brain tumors showing.
Liver enlarged.. could be NASH..(non-alcoholic syndrome of the liver)  Need a new liver but have too many things  wrong for a new one.  Host's son has it-he is on the list for a new liver.
Head hurts alot-they still dont know why...
We had 3 new family members..rescued a blue-mitted ragdoll cat that was a breeder... had her for about 3 months now-finally will let you pet her. And 2 5 wk old kittens.  One torti and a gray striped tabby..names of all, Babbette ..the ragdoll, torti is Callie and tabby is Willow.  K just loves all her "an-mules".
Oh and there are some new "humans" to the family.
A real strange story.. host's  son  married the lady across the street.. has 2 kids a girl 13 and boy 12.
She lives across the street and he lives here.  He did it so she would quit beating the girl.
She still beats her but not as much.  The "marriage" took place in April of this year.  Really weird.
She weights about 300 lbs.. Frank is about 150 lbs. She has no teeth and is not a clean person. Right now she has ring worm all over herself!  We, me and K .. we dont go over there!  Too many bugs  crawling all over the place and her one puppy died!!!  From dehydration, starvation and worms!
Really nasty over there!
It is starting to get cool here at night..I guess being on top of the mountain summers are short.
It is really weird outside tonight... really quiet... no noise...weird.
School starts in one week.  So that means no kids around during the day.  Brandon is still home schooling.
He is in 8th grade this year.
He wants to go back to public school in 9th grade.  I dont think he can with his autism.  He cant take notes.
Thats about all the up dates.
Oh I think there is another "part" trying to make themselves known.. dont know much yet  but there is "another" person there.
K has been depressed lately..hardly anyone is talking to her on poly..she hardly is even making pics on there.  Just plays her games on the computer.
Sometimes her depression can be felt by myself.
Well that is about enough for now.. so everyone who follows this didnt think we died or something!
Later!