Friday, October 18, 2013

Long Time

This is Crystal
I am horrible at keeping this up.
Well back in May we almost died.
The Home Health Nurse over dosed me on my IV medicine for my MS. There are 18 days that are not there in my life.
Was taken to the local hospital ER and transferred to a Hospital in Tennessee - put on a ventilator.
There was no need for that because it was a combination of all the IV Ativan and Sleep apnea that caused the "no breathing" problem.
After they figured that out - but first because of someone not using sterile techniques- I ended up with Staph in my lungs they took me off the vent and transferred me to a regular room instead of ICU.
So that was 10 days of antibiotics. because of THEIR lousy staff people.

And then they kept me tied down and said I was combative when all it was is - I cant lay on my back because I am still recovering from my last fall which resulted in a broken lower back! SO they were trying to keep me on my back and I was in pain but too out of it from the Ativan and they wouldn't listen to me. So therefore they tied me down and threated to put me in the psych ward if I didn't listen to them.
THEN  the CNA was too damn lazy to comb out my long hair (it was almost waist length) and she cut it to the shoulders and UNEVEN!  With it that long there should have been no reason for it to be uneven! I am still pissed about that! The cutting of the hair.
The last 3 days in the hospital I kept asking to see the doctor and he never showed up in my room for those 3 days.  Not even at night!
I know because by then all the Ativan had worn off and I have a very bad cause of insomnia!  I didn't sleep for those last 3 days in there.  So I know a doctor didn't show up - even though the bill says 2 doctors were in there to see me.
I fell and broke my foot- that is what started all this. I didn't know what I was doing because the overdose put my blood sugar over 700.  Also separated my left shoulder which no one caught until last week when an x-ray was taken because of someone backing into my car (in the hospital parking lot!).
So all I know is what Terry's son told us.  Kalisa doesn't even remember.
Well- any how - the foot STILL is broken- it wont heal, the overdose fried the pancreas and now we have to take insulin.  Oh - which I forgot to take yesterday- I better go take it now- time
out! OK  blood sugar next~~~~Oh well that up but that was after a drink of lemonade.
We have kidney stones.  Don't know what the doc is going to do for them.  Needs to do something- makes my back hurt more.
So any how- that was the hospital incident...

Next the Sexual trauma shrink wont allow us in her group - she said we qualify to be there but might be too disruptive because of the DID.. so there for NO therapy once again.  That is prejudice!
But then I found out that there is a lot of prejudice against women there at the Veteran's hospital.  That is where we go - we are a Vietnam Vet.  Some of the men - doctors included treat you like shit!
And complaining doesn't do you any good because the person you file a complaint with is also in that "We hate women" group!

Our blood pressure is always up when we go there because we know that we are going to get grief!
Even the cop who took the report on the accident- he said he was going to arrest me if I didn't stop crying so he could understand what I was saying! Can you believe that! And he had an attitude problem!  He really had an "I hate mother" complex!

But ~~ now for the home front... K has changed the doll houses around again.  She has 5 (3 rather large) 2 smaller houses, a cottage, beach house and stables.  Only the first 5 are out and right now she only has the 2 smaller ones set up.  That is because she sets them up according to what is going on with her "real" foster family.  Right now there is a family feud- I guess that is what you would call it- so the other houses are put up.  Each family member has a house, all their children and pets, etc go with each house.  So the 3 that are the "bad" ones right now as she calls them- are put up- I guess in a time out till they straighten up!  It still makes for a cramped bed room!
But she has fun with them and it keeps her occupied.

There is another "part" that showed itself for a couple of days about a month ago- no name is known.
Only that is may be a disruptive part.  Glad "it" didn't stick around!

Terry was out briefly.  Last night.  But I don't remember why she came out.  I only was able to "feel" her presence. She doesn't come around much.  Maybe once or twice a year.  And she is the "host" for those who are reading this for the first time.  She opted out around ..oh..around 10 years ago.  And Elizabeth who was the "big" who took over when Terry left - opted out after we didn't go to therapy any more - oh... that is about  7 yrs ago.
So that leaves me-Crystal (16 yrs old) and Kalisa (4 years old).  I do the grown up stuff- K is out most of the time.

She has her "babys" dolls that look real - and she treats them as though they are real,  her doll houses and the computer.
She loves getting "wittle wetters"  (little letters) from people.  She is thrilled  even if it is just a "Hi how are you".  She really would wish if her "mommy" would email her. There really isn't any reason why she cant just say hi to her.

And I, me, Crystal, wishes that Tedi would let us in the group again. I, me, Crystal had some friends that gave me support that I need and know that I could get more support from that group- but she blocked us. And her reason is a personal one.  Unfair.  Even people from the group think it is unfair.
I wish I had the support again.  It helped me.
Ok enough of that.

Other then the traumatic hospital experience in May and the car thingy 2 weeks ago-I guess for not having therapy is going OK.  But it sure would be nice to have someone to talk to.  Someone who understand what is like to be DID and have gone or is going through some of the same stuff.

Well K wants to "do some-fings ons de wittles  tbs fings".
So not really much of a catch up  but this will have to do.
Tedi-please unblock me - I need the support....