Friday, March 5, 2010

Locked in 4 yr old mind

This is Crystal - (I am 16 yr old part)
I have come to the conclusion that maybe Kalisa has it made.  She doesnt have to handle the everyday stuff - I should say the everyday life stuff....I can see why people have the problems they do.... I liked just being the "me part" and only having to handle the "part" stuff.

Everyday life sucks!   I can see why Terry (the host) and Elizabeth - the main adult part that took over after Terry went on her permanent "vacation" (as K calls it)  ducked out !
Elizabeth thought it isnt worth the hassle anymore since K only has to survive everyday living - E did the driving and the bills and doctor stuff.
But since there isnt any therapy - of any kind to go to - and since the president and the state took away our medical insurance - that means NO doctors - no money to go to them! "We" owe about $4000.00 in dr bills for last year... What do you do when you dont have the money to pay them?  I mean I am asking the question as a question.... What do you do?  I mean - I dont know.
We got the food situation conquered yesterday - went to a church and they will give us food for the next 3 months.  So we got that figured out.

Had to do a car inspection the other day.   Had no idea what the guy was talking about - only knew that used our food and electric bill money to get the car inspected.

K just "takes care of her babies" (life like dolls)  She thinks that they are really real!  And treats them that way.  She has her 4 "torgues-es" (tortoises) and the dog.  She plays on polyvore and Facebook with her "fluff" and is content. 

Now last week - this poor body was soooooo   sick!  "We" had to get the IV for 3 days for the MS flare up -it is like getting a chemo treatment.  We got so sick from it this time around.  Other times we didnt get that sick at all.  K actually stayed in - only came out to try and I say try to eat  some cookies or something like that.  Came out a couple of times while watching "the babies getting borneds" on TV.  She still is trying to figure out how they get in there!  Remember the t trying to explain that to her - could tell that the t never had any kids!  lol

Just wish K's "new mommy" would just send her a "hi" or make her a pic on poly for her - would get her out of the depression she is in.  I feel she owes K that much.

"We" are always going to exisit.  "We" are never going to get the opportunity to "heal"  - this body will go out of this wold in  its present DID state because there just isnt any help out there for us to do the necessary healing.  In a couple of weeks the body turns 56 - and with the present health state of the body "we" dont have that opportunity of time - to get and have necessary healing.
At least there is no more abuse - since the bad man "droppeds  obers deadeds" as K says.  That was in Nov last year.
So now it is bad memories and all the alters....

We did find out thate Charlie - the "I want to die " part - is female not male.  We and the t thought it was male.
And there is Willow, Autumn, Emily - new child parts that have made themselves known on polyvore.
I wonder how many other parts there are?

Oh well, I guess I complainded enough for awhile............

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